Exhaling Through the Ordinary

I need to take a moment to say a deep and heartfelt thank you for sticking by us during this time. After I posted that blog post last week, the outpouring of emails, calls, texts, in-person hugs, facebook posts, etc. etc., really deeply touched me. [And sorry for crying in front of a bunch of you on Friday…. real life, people.] Sorry if I didn’t get back to everyone yet, it’s actually kind of hard to keep up, but talk about cathartic. I really think that this blog and all of you following it are really keeping me sane during this time. We are nothing without our people, and Tristan and I sure are lucky to have you all. Tristan thinks we should probably move to the middle of nowhere and write a book about this journey when it’s all over and done. It’s kind of a fun idea, but then again anything on the other side of this surgery seems like a fun idea. 🙂The ordinary

Today feels like a good day – and not because anything amazing or miraculous happened – but simply because nothing remarkable at all happened. These are the days that I once took so for granted, and now I look for the ordinary and unremarkable to give us a break.

Nothing speaks to me more right now than these two quotes from LR Knost, who is an international writer who focuses on parenting. She also happens to be battling a very rare form of cancer right now. While I am nearly certain that we will reflect on this entire time (one day….) as some of the “awful” for us, I also know that finding some semblance of peace and tiny moments of joy through all of this has kept us going. And it’s built our perseverance – as Tristan says, “after going through this, I think we can get through anything together”. Did we need to have more perseverance? Did we deserve all of this? No. No, I really don’t think so, but there it is, and what else to do but accept and move forward?Peace in struggle

A few pieces of good news since I last wrote. We went ahead and secured a house in the Palo Alto area to stay in during the surgery + recovery time. We had to book the house for five weeks, which is how long the hospital stay and subsequent recovery time for Tristan is going to be. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, Palo Alto is INSANELY expensive. That’s why the fundraiser earlier this year has made, literally, all the difference for us. There is absolutely no way we could have made this work without your support. Have I said THANK YOU yet? Seriously, thank you all so much.

Tristan’s oncology appointment is still set for the end of this month, but we are really moving forward with the Nov. 18 date for surgery. My mom booked her flight for her and my step-dad to stay in our house and watch our kitties for us during the month, Liina and JJ are working out their plans to travel here in November, and their parents Bob and Kasandra are making their arrangements, too. I’m working out work leave details and Tristan is trying to do the same. If this all comes together and we reach the other side it’s going to be one of the most gratitude-filled thanksgivings of our lives, that’s for damn sure.

In the vein of keeping things a little sappy tonight, I’m going to leave you with a few lyrics that are resonating with me right now.

Drew Holcomb and the Neighbors, “Live Forever”

Laughter is the only thing that’ll keep you sane // In this world that’s crying more and more everyday // Don’t let evil get you down // In this madness spinning round and round

I want you to live forever // Underneath the sky so blue

Some people say faith is a childish game // Play on, children, like it’s Christmas day // Sing me a song, sing me a melody // Sing out loud, you’re a symphony

I want you to live forever // Underneath the sky so blue

Take courage when the road is long, Don’t ever forget you’re never alone


I have to say, I feel anything but alone these days, and it’s because of you.

Once again fully filled with gratitude,





3 thoughts on “Exhaling Through the Ordinary

  1. I’m so proud of how strong you both are, and hope you know I’m always thinking of you both even if we don’t talk for weeks or months. Please let me know if there is anything I can do to help when you are in Palo Alto! Love you guys so much!

  2. Hi Tristan and Ali,

    I was chatting with John Dennis this morning and apparently I hadn’t told him that the surgery for you, Tristan, had been scheduled. He wants me to pass on to you that you are in his thoughts and very active prayers for the duration of this ordeal. He would also like to be included in these Wellness posts, if you can add him. He shared with me that 6 weeks ago he was at Massachusetts General Hospital as Head of Care Team for a friend who had a (very successful) kidney transplant. His email is: johnddennis@comcast.net

    Love, Mom


  3. Hi Alisyn & Tristan, so good to hear of a day that can be just “a day” ! This is Susan, old dance friend of Kasandra’s. I am so happy to hear of the Palo Alto house coming through. A space of your own for peace & recovery is just the ticket.
    I look forward to meeting you soon, as I am in SF area & live in Foster City, a town about 20 minutes north of Palo Alto.
    With loving thoughts, Susan

    PS/ I am a helluva cook & look forward to bringing some chow to you all (:-)

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